


If you love me (don't let go)

by Bohemian (Linguam)



Series: Post 3x10: Erchomai [3]
Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Alec Lightwood Loves Magnus Bane, Feels, Fluff, Good Boyfriend Alec Lightwood, M/M, Magnus Bane Deserves Nice Things, Magnus Bane Loves Alec Lightwood, Post-Episode: s03e10 Erchomai, soft boyfriends
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-31
Updated: 2018-05-31
Packaged: 2019-05-16 14:58:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 685
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14813576
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Linguam/pseuds/Bohemian
Summary: "What if I wanted to leave?"





	If you love me (don't let go)

**Author's Note:**

> Still have some processing to do, it seems. That mid-season finale really messed me up.

“What if I wanted to leave?”

The words are no more than a whisper, barely disrupting the sprinkle of dust flakes that float in the air. It’s a quiet morning, soft tendrils of sunlight shining through the curtains and setting the golden sheets ablaze. They’ve been awake for quite some time but still haven’t made a move to get out of bed, both content to stay in their own, private bubble for a little longer, where the outside world and all its troubles only exist in the far-off periphery.

You’d think banishing the Queen of Hell would grant at least a few days of peace, Magnus thinks, giving an internal sigh. But, alas, you’d be sorely mistaken.

The surface under him shifts.

“What, you mean leave New York?” Alec’s voice is low and husky, sleepy words mumbled into Magnus’ hair and arms loosely encircling Magnus’ waist.

It's the last morning like this they’ll probably have for a while. Alec is returning to the Institute today, healed enough that he can’t be persuaded to put it off any longer—although Magnus knows for a fact that his arm still bothers him, and he has awoken more than once to shallow, cut-off breathing from the other side of the bed, as if Alec’s body still expects there to be some kind of resistance, preventing deeper, fuller breaths.

Then again, apparently it takes more than near death to keep his workaholic boyfriend from his duties for long.

He hums confirmation at Alec’s question. The responding shrug gently jostles his head.

“Then I’d come with you,” Alec says, as if the answer is obvious, and although it warms Magnus’ heart more effectively than any sun ever could, it also shows that he doesn’t grasp the full extent of what Magnus is really saying.

He slowly shakes his head.

“No, I mean… Not just for a few days.” He wets his lips. “What if I wanted to leave… indefinitely.”

The fingers trailing over his back falter.

“Oh.”

The silence that fills the room is loaded, but not exactly uncomfortable: a ripple across halcyon waters: a lone star, shooting across opaque skies.

Alec resumes his gentle mapping of Magnus’ skin.

“Then the Clave would have my resignation papers first thing in the morning.”

Magnus blinks. Turning around in his lover’s arms, he meets Alec’s earnest expression with what he is sure is one of disbelief.

“You can’t mean that.”

Alec frowns.

“Why not?” he asks, genuinely confused, and all Magnus can do is stare at him in wonder.

“What about your job?” he eventually manages. “Your family? Not to mention that I know you still have so much you want to accomplish here…”

“And none of it would matter if it meant I’d lose you,” Alec says, with an eyeroll that is ten percent fondness and ninety percent exasperation. “Magnus, if leaving New York is what you want, then we’ll leave. Catarina can portal us, or I’ll book us tickets to- to Mumbai, Iceland, Papua New Guinea… wherever you want to go.”

He cradles Magnus’ cheek, long fingers brushing the soft hairs at the base of Magnus’ skull.

“Anything you want,” he says, voice low but sincere. “Just say the word.”

Magnus shakes his head, throat tight with emotion.

“Please don’t say that,” he whispers, _pleads_ , because he can’t bear any empty promises, or platitudes born from guilt, not from _him_. “Not if you don’t mean it.”

“I do mean it,” Alec insists quietly, thumb gently stroking Magnus’ cheekbone. “After everything you’ve sacrificed for other people, you deserve to be someone’s first priority, Magnus.”

Releasing a breath he hadn’t even realized he’d been holding, Magnus closes his burning eyes and leans into Alec’s palm. No matter how many times Alec keeps exceeding his expectations, keeps amazing him, he doesn’t think he’ll ever get used to it.

He swallows.

“In that case, can we stay here?” His voice is rough. “I know you have to get to the Institute, but… just for a moment?”

Dry lips press against his forehead. Warm breath ghosting over his skin.

“For as long as you want.”


End file.
